A well-known statement heard when things go wrong is something like this: “Well, that’s Murphy’s law for ya!” When spoken these days, it means “If anything can go wrong, it will.” It’s an odd choice of words that, when spoken together, depicts how one may just humbly accept that things just got stupid, or overwhelming, and there may just be an undesired chain reaction that follows within that realm of “S**t Happens”.
Introducing the lesser known: Yhprum’s law Yes, it’s Murphy spelled backwards, and it is this: “Everything that can work, will work.”
As goes the universe, these seemingly opposing theories strike a balance. Here’s a twist on Murphy’s law and Yhprum’s law,
Lil’ Murph’s law #1: Call it abnormal or wrong, if you wish, I drink my meals in a fruit and vegetable smoothie now. That is just the way it is.
Murph: “Mmoomm… did you seriously sneak a spinach leaf between my cute lippies while I had them apart?”
Me: “You need to eat like a normal lizard again, Murph. I don’t think other lizards’ Mommies and Daddies need to blend 3 days worth of a balanced diet into smoothies and feed their healthy sweeties with a syringe! Starving lizards would be happy to eat that leaf! It’s yummy!”
Murph: “I’m not having it this way.”Me: “…Sigh… well, you’re so cute and special. Fine then!”
Lil’ Murph’s law #2: It is decided, I used to poo on my newspaper potty spot, I now choose to refuse pooing in my cage anywhere! It is to remain clean!
Murph: “Let me out! I need to go!”
Murph: “You think I simply want to play in the warm water. But I have been observant when I am your kitchen companion, I realize what goes down this hole goes away. I’m about to position myself, you’ll be needing to bleach the sink in a moment.”
Murph: “I will potty outside! Let’s stay out a little longer!”
Murph: “I will potty on the entry rug. I will potty on the nice carpet, you’ll need the rubbing alcohol. Also, prepare to run my bath water, please.”
FOR EVERY ACTION IS A REACTION. TO SEE ‘WHAT WORKS’ IN REGARDS TO LIL’ MURPH’S LAWS ABOVE, WE VISIT YHPRUM’S LAW BELOW (with a twist).:
What works #1:
Me: “Okay Murph, I love you, I know you’re hungry, and now, apparently irreversibly stubborn. I made you a fresh smoothie. You better like it, it’s mixed with love. I spent 10 minutes washing, slicing, and blending unsalted peanuts (for added protein), apple, grapes, blueberries, strawberries, banana, bell pepper, kale, 2 spinach leaves, and your calcium powder to an ideal syringe-squirting dense liquid!! And I know you eat 3/4 a syringe full 2 or 3 times daily. That’s 14 to 21 hand-feedings a week, Murph… just sayin’!”
What works #2:
*not on Murph, the poo spot
Me: “Okay Murph, I love you, I know you have to go, but please, don’t keep it sucked in, and if you must, at least try to do your business on the hard kitchen floor.”